A piece of advice for parents of high school age kids

Please do not wait until your child is graduating to start your search for a program after school. Talk to people, look on line for programs , get as much information as possible and you still may find that you have to kind of settle for a second or third choice until you can get the one you want. Take note that many of these programs end with the age of around 22 years old. This doesn't leave much time. By the way, I believe it is just silly to think that our children can learn all they need to be an adult in life by then! Many young adults don't even know what they want to do with their life at that age. How can we expect that our children with autism will by ready for adulthood? Obviously, I have been thinking about this a lot lately. We parents have so much to do no think about for our children/young adults that when things get in our head we need to vent! Haha... I am just a mom, I believe being a parent was all I've have ever been good at and I think we have done great with our children. The problem is when you have a child that needs more from the world than you can give, life becomes extremely frustrating. Raising children is hard enough without having to depend on the state/government to help give your child what they need to have a better life. I do understand that within the umbrella of autism there are many abilities and needs, I do not pretend that there are bigger issues and needs than what our son needs, but when you are in it and live it every day all you care about in that time is what your child needs. I know that is true for most every parent. One day things will get better and I hope someone reads this that can and will help all those touched by autism. I am doing what I can by trying to help the next family any way I can. That is my goal, I don't know how to help except to start a conversation and hope it goes somewhere... You are not alone, we are in this together, as a family. Lets help each other!

Puzzled

I started this blog because I really want to share our experiences in the chance that it may help someone else out there who needs some support. I have given my number to many people who have young children with autism and I wonder what keeps than from calling, even just to vent. So, I thought I would let you all know that I check the blog numerous times a day in case someone has a question or concern. I am aware that all of our children are different and have many different issues, but even if I don't have an answer, someone reading might and I would try to find some information on whatever topic discussed. Parents, there are so many people out there to help or even just talk to. Please talk to someone because this is too hard to do alone. Get advice from people you trust and books or anything that my help you process what is going on; some of the things you read or hear will apply and some won't. Remember that no one wrote a book on your child, take from the information what applies to your child and skip the rest you have enough to worry about. I had to come to that realization in a time of real frustration with a stage Keith was going through while my husband was deployed after 9/11. After this, I was able to get back on track with our son and take different things from different sources of information that I could use or understand with Keith. I try to stress that the more you work with your child on even the smallest of things they can do independently the less stress for every one. I know some may say it is easy for me to say because my son is an adult, well getting him were he is today too a lot of work, tears, patience (which I am not known for). The goal in raising children is to raise a good, independent person, try to keep in mind that they will grow up one day and they need to learn all they are capable of learning because we will not always be there for them. Set them up for success as much as you can, these children deserve that from us and all things offered to them. Demand what they need and don't settle. If you don't feel heard, keep having meetings until you get to someone who makes the changes needed. The idea is the school and family work together for the child to be the best version of themselves they can be, so parents do your part and make the schools do theirs.Please feel free to ask questions or leave comments for me!! You can add me on Facebook or Email me at any time!! Your feedback is greatly appreciated!! Also, if you know of any autism awareness event or want to share your story, please do so!! Thank you to everyone for reading and sharing!!  ~A Proud Mom~

Leave it to my son...

Yet again Keith opens my eyes. As I have probably stated before he continues to teach us about who he is and how he learns. The past few weeks Keith has been showing us a more engaging, social side of him that we have not really seen. 
I truly believe that everything happens for a reason and although we may not know or understand the reasoning at the time, it works out for the best in the end. As parents we carry our children's struggles more than their accomplishments, this is as it should be, but it can make things very difficult at times. Last spring we had our son quit his job because we thought he was going to go to college and wanted him to focus on school more so we thought this was a sound diction, turns out we really could not afford the program at this college. Now he has no job and no school! You can imagine our frustration and guilt! It seemed we had made all kind of mistakes and allowed our excitement take over. 
Since than Keith has not been working and has not been very happy about sitting in his room. Now understand this is the child who usually wanted to just be in his room and focus on his movie ideas. He thought he could just go make a movie and be rich, that easy--even though we have had many very honest conversations about how difficult it is to be the next Steven 

Spielberg  I say all this because now he seems to have more of an understanding about how life works, now he just wants a job while he works on his movie ideas. I knew that it would take time, but even after all his 21 years, I still get so consumed with his current thinking or behavior that I forget that the day usually comes when he just gets it! 
Know that it is normal to get a little caught up sometimes, but it's okay. They will show you when they understand something new, and no matter the age the thrill of there accomplishments are always just as exciting! We are all learning our way through life, we should enjoy the education with our children. No one's life is meant to be like anyone else's, so enjoy the life you have, you may stumble, you may even fall, but as long as you don't give up your child won't either!

Please feel free to ask questions or leave comments for me!! You can add me on Facebook or Email me at any time!! Your feedback is greatly appreciated!!

Also, if you know of any autism awareness event or want to share your story, please do so!!

Thank you to everyone for reading and sharing!! 

~A Proud Mom~