We all know that discipline is a subject that gets many people on edge. I truly believe that all children need discipline, but to make it effective you have to find out what will work for each child. As the child grows the types of discipline have to grow and change with the child. I believe in spanking, but please understand that a spanking is much different than beating! I would never condone abuse! We learned that discipline had to be different with each of our children and spanking was not always the answer. I am a strict parent and I always expected our children to behave, however we always had a lot of fun together: we were silly, played games, and read together. I always tried to be the best parent I could be and I truly believe that good discipline is a big part of that.
Figuring out how to disciple a child with autism has some challenges, but they still must have boundaries and rules--actually they need more. Think of it this way, by doing this they will be more ready for what the world will have in store for them. Lets face it, a person with special needs will have more obstacles than most, preparing them will be hard, challenging, and seem improbable at times, but know that you are setting them up for the best life they can have. When it gets hard, just remember that you are really helping them.
At times we still have to tell Keith things that we have been saying since he was little, which can get repetitive and frustrating. Please know that wherever your child is now will improve if you help them learn to be as independent as possible. It will also take stress off of you as the parent knowing they can do most of the self-care by themselves. Words cannot describe the true joy that you will feel when they master a task on their own! Many times you can't gauge when it will happen but when it does nothing else matters: all the struggling, stress, and tears that build up to that moment in time all melt away to just pure happiness! Tears of joy and pride fill you as you realize that although it will take time and work, anything is possible.
Discipline is not easy but when you find what works it makes all things easier to teach. Take baby steps with everything and it will all work out. Know that you are helping them learn to control themselves and once they can do that, everything else that they could possibly want to do become more possible. Another thing to keep in mind is that when we don't punish our children, autism or not, we are limiting them. Never think that you are pushing your child to do something that they will never grasp or understand. When you do that to them, autism isn't putting a cap on their abilities or their minds, you are. Push them and encourage them to keep trying and learning; do not use autism or any other difference be an excuse for their behavior. That is not to say you should be extremely harsh on them or mean, but I am saying that the capabilities of your children will always surprise you when you give them the opportunity to show you what they are.
Please leave comments, questions, or suggestions for future posts!! Thanks for reading!!
~A Proud Mom~
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